I always accept the flyers that are handed out at intersections because a. the poor sod handing them out is just doing a job and b., every now and then you stumble upon an absolute gem. You know you’re in for a treat when the opening sentence is:
“DR. DAVID has been legalised to import the [Mulondo] herbal remedy, which has been naturally pounded and squeezed from the roots of the Mulondo tree, used for thousands of years in Uganda to make men’s penis big and strong permanently.”
Dr. David is also able to cure the following needs/ailments
- Bad smell
- Want to make it tight
- Divorce matters (7 days only)
- Bring back lost lover no matter how long
- Protection against your enemies
- Customer attraction
- Bless your money with luck so as to multiply
- Witchcraft removed and seen with your eyes
- Want to know enemies and get rid of them?
And that, my friends, is why I love living in Africa.
If you’d like to reach Dr. David in his swanky new offices in Sandton, nogal, he can be reached on 073 278 0247, 24 hours a day.